Hi, me current day editing this – just so you know, all of these baby posts were written in real time so there will be a little back & forth time travel going on for the next few weeks while I try to get all of these live. And thanks again for all the well wishes and congratulations. We really appreciate all the support out there.
6.10.13. (4 Weeks)
So we took our trip to the East Coast and we knew that on this trip we’d find out if we were pregnant or not. I don’t think one minute went by that I did not think about it. Every morning when I went to the bathroom I’d be afraid I was going to get my period and every night when I went to bed I said a little prayer, asking God to please let me be pregnant. I always get my period day 11 past ovulation. Always. And I’m pretty sure I gave myself an ulcer on days 8-10…dreading another month where I wasn’t pregnant. I’ll even admit to having a few drinks on this vacation (and maybe some moonshine in Nashville) because I was convinced I wasn’t pregnant and I needed to do something to calm myself down and take the edge off. Day 10 comes and goes. I tell Chris I will be getting my period the next day. Day 11 was the worst. I was terrified I’d get my period any minute. But day 11 ended and still no period. Day 12. No period. Day 13. No period.
We’d decided we’d test in Charleston. 14 days past the IUI. My dr had told me to test on days 12-14 so I figured I’d push myself to the end of that time frame. We get into Charleston on day 13. Unpack our bags and start to tour around town but I tell Chris we have to get a pregnancy test so I can test in the morning. So in I go to Harris Teeter and buy a clear blue easy digital test (2 pack) and tote it around in my camera bag for most of the evening. My emotions are crazy the entire day. I start to imagine what it would be like to actually see “pregnant” on the test instead of not pregnant. I’ve never made it this far into a cycle. I drink my mix of club soda and lemonade at the bar while we watch the Miami – San Antonio game. My every thought occupied by what will happen the next morning. We finally head to the last bar of the night – “Closed for Business” and the anxiety gets worse. By the time we walk out of the bar I’m about ready to burst into tears. I just can’t possibly handle seeing another negative pregnancy test. All I wanted to do was crawl into bed so that I could wake up the next morning and take the test.
I woke up at 6:30. I told myself I wasn’t going to test until 7:30. Serious agony. I checked Facebook, Instagram, Bloglovin… barely 7. Then I drank a bunch of water. Just to make sure I could pee enough. Now it was 7. Still a half hour to kill. So I read on Wikipedia the history of Charleston. But I couldn’t focus on anything. It was all a blur. Finally about about 7:15 I moved on to Perez Hilton. Mindless gossip to fill my wandering mind. Finally 7:30 rolls around and I tell Chris I’m going to test. I go in, pee (the longest pee of my life – TMI) and prepare myself to wait about 3 minutes. I sit there and watch that hour glass turn…only about a minute goes by and I get my answer.
I opened the bathroom door and told Chris, “I’m pregnant.” He smiled and said something like “I knew it. Your period is never late.” And then I crawled into bed, he wrapped me in his arms and I started to cry. And shake. And smile. All those baby names. Those Pinterest nursery ideas. Those visions of a little curly haired boy or girl could finally become a reality.
We laid in bed for a while and eventually got up and had breakfast (Charleston and the Andrew Pinckney in will always have a special place in my heart by the way). And then we headed out to Folly Beach and the Boone Plantation before coming back to Charleston.
On our way back I called my Dr to let them know I’d tested positive and then they go ahead and freak me out and tell me I have to go get my blood drawn. That my hormone levels need to be doubling and that I’d need to take a test today and on Wednesday and probably Friday. So we hunt down an out-patient lab in the middle of downtown Charleston and spend about a half hour there getting my blood drawn. I thought they would be sending the results to my Dr today but I never heard back so it’s been another day of worries. After the blood draw we grab lunch, go on a horse carriage tour and then wander around more of Charleston – the waterfront and the Battery before heading to King St. for dinner. It’s fun now because whenever we’d see kids Chris makes a cute comment about how we could have someone that looked like this one or that one…For dinner we’d actually gotten dressed up and had planned on going somewhere “fancy” to celebrate but Chris and I are not fancy people. And we ended up at the Chicken King eating wraps/sandwiches. Then is started pouring. And thundering. And the sky filled with lightening. Chris wanted to go watch the Beav game at the bar down the street. I knew it was far but I thought I could tough it out but let me just tell you – walking in the pouring down rain with lightening flashing all over the place is not fun. So we made it as far as Closed For Business and called a cab. Chris had one drink and then it was time to go. Now he’s off at the bar next door and I’m cozy in bed.
What a day.
I just wanted to bask in my pregnancy and not get stressed out. I thought I’d made it through all the stressed out part. Wrong again. I keep telling myself everything is fine. That if I was at a normal OBGYN they wouldn’t be making me get all the blood draws. That I’m getting extra special treatment because of ORM. Hopefully I get the lab results tomorrow and then we’ll hunt down a lab in Savannah. Finally Friday we’ll be home and I’ll be able to go back to my doctor like normal.
There’s seriously so much more I want to write. Like my symptoms – honestly it was my lack of them that tipped me off. I normally get some discharge before my period. It’s my tell tail sign. And this time I didn’t get any. I also had cramps – a lot of them. Not quite period cramps – but still very crampy. I kept telling Chris that I was having cramps and was convinced I’d get my period. My husband, ever the rock, kept asking me if you could still have cramps and be pregnant? Well yes… The cramps were the worst in Wilmington and the drive there. These pinching cramps on each side (assuming my ovaries) with the occasional feeling of my insides being scraped. Once we arrived we headed down to check out the River Walk and I felt the strongest cramp – on my right side and even into my back. It was like “bam” and then it was over. That night they were pretty strong too. I was sitting up on the couch with my feet propped up on the coffee table secretly hoping this was a good thing. In hindsight I’m pretty sure implantation happened in Wilmington because after that night things started to get much less crampy.
All of this is so hard. For so long I’ve waited for this moment. So much that I could barely even make myself believe it was true. I mean, who gets pregnant on their 1st round of fertility treatments? But I’m trying not to stress about it. Instead I’m soaking it all and enjoying it.